CUCKOLDRESS - FEMDOM MARRIAGE
From Steve W:
Dear Ms. Sutton, I don't even know where to begin. You see my story is a FemDom experience but I am neither the dominant nor the submissive. I am the third party in what I can now to identify as cuckolding. A few months ago I started doing some research to learn about D/s and Female Dominance when I started questioning my relationship with a married woman. I had strong doubts, yet I continued to play a role in what I feel is an abusive situation.
I learned about cuckolding through some other sites, though I knew exactly what we were doing, I just didn't know what you call it. Eventually I discovered your site. Perhaps the greatest compliment I can pay you is I've learned more from what I have read here than all other sites combined. Your responses to stories and questions are very responsible, soundly reasoned, and based on high moral standards. Not at all to imply I share a lot of your beliefs but I now have a tremendous amount of respect and admiration for those who pursue this lifestyle for the right reasons. I'm sure they have a genuine connection and love I've certainly never found in a relationship. My problem is I've only been exposed to a woman who uses Female Domination as a means to maintain and abuse power.
I feel terrible for having played a role in the cuckoldjng of another man. I just wanted you to know your answers on your Q&A for cuckolding has made me finally decide to do what I should have done long ago and helped to solve my moral dilemma. Cuckolding does not strengthen their marriage. The intent and motive is purely malevolent. There is no discussion between this wife and her husband. Still he has always known about me and his wife and for a long time I felt that made it OK, even though how we have done this pretty much violates all your advice on the right way to go about cuckolding. The irony is this woman has power and even after I end our relationship, she no doubt will just find someone else. She is my long time boss and a very highly thought of woman in our workplace.
Here is our story. I'm a 29 yr. old male. My boss is a 45 yr. old married woman who hired me straight out of college and took me under her wing. She has always been a friend, mentor, and confidant. I am personally indebted to her. I have always had a tremendous amount of respect for her and held her in very high regard. She is an exceptionally attractive and intelligent woman. She'd been my wildest fantasy for years though our relationship had always been professional.
Last July we went on business trip trying to woo a major client. She can be very demanding and she'd been pushing me real hard and I kind of snapped at her. She was furious and ignored me as much as she could until the night before we were to fly home. She called me to her hotel room for what I was certain would be a heart to heart but instead she undressed ever so comfortably in front of me as I watched in complete shock. She basically told me that there was a lot of negative energy built up between us and we needed to work that out and turn it into something positive. She stood before me in just panties and pumps with her hands on her hips and told me to get undressed, implying no wasn't an option. I didn't have to be told twice. She grabbed me by the balls and told me it was time for an attitude adjustment. It was the most exciting night of my life.
We began meeting secretly for sex all the time. But she was always more concerned with hiding it from co-workers than her husband. Before all this happened, I had met her husband on several occasions over the years at Christmas parties etc. and always considered him a very lucky guy. I knew it was wrong to have sex with a married woman but it was so exciting. I'd never been with a married woman. Actually, I had also never been with an older woman or someone as sexually experienced as her. I got attached to her pretty quick. It was and still is the best sex of my life. But I started feeling guilty enough to mention it after a few weeks. She snickered and said "how do you think I'm able to stay out all night? I tell my husband everything and in great detail."
She seemed very proud of it. I couldn't possibly believe something like that so she called him while we were lying in bed and handed me the phone. I was stunned. He told me something to the effect that he can't please her sexually and she needs a younger man. That was good enough for my conscience at the time.
She'd often spend the entire night with me at my place. That made it so easy. I figured that since her husband was OK with it, than it must be OK. I was only thinking about myself and through a certain part of my anatomy. We did that for 5 months. She naturally assumed the lead but the sex has always been mutually rewarding. There were kinky things. She occasionally spanked me over her knee but it was playful and silly. She came out of the bathroom one time wearing a strap-on trying to catch me off guard and she chased me around as we both giggled, but I never permitted her to penetrate me with it. She's always had the leather and sexy heels and boots. I'm as guilty as any man when it comes to that and she'd been torturing me for years at the office wearing them so I've never complained. Call me naďve.
I was completely ignorant of anything associated with D/s or Female Dominance. I had no idea of the true nature of their marriage. Occasionally, I'd hear her belittle him or say something that struck me as peculiar on the phone but nothing that could have prepared me for when she invited me to her house with her husband home for the first time. I didn't know he would be there. It was quite an eye opening experience.
She opened the door wearing all black leather with the pants, stiletto heeled thigh-highs, lace up
halter-top, full-length gloves, collar, hair pulled back in a ponytail. She was one of the most incredible sights I've ever seen. He, on the other hand, was the most pathetic sight I'd ever seen. He was wearing panties and bra, a wig, and had high-heels locked to his feet. I didn't look close enough to notice the cock cage. I was very uncomfortable. She hugged and kissed me and encouraged me to feel her ass with him watching. He's a big guy. I was wondering how he'd take it. I was kind of looking over my shoulder but it didn't take her long to make me forget about him. She ordered him to bed and it was like 7:00.
We started having sex with him in the next room more often than not. She told me that first night he enjoys it. She talked a little about D/s and their lifestyle. I was in disbelief. I asked her how often they have sex. She told me never. In fact she gave me a detailed account that it had been more than 2 years since she had sex with her husband. She told me about his 24/7 chastity and strictly monitored masturbation program. They have not had sex since the day their daughter left for her freshmen year of college. I mean nothing, no oral sex, only the occasional strap-on, if that counts. She says they never will again. That's an awful lot to handle all at once for the uninitiated. My initial impression was how could he be so stupid? He has the hottest wife in the world. I didn't understand it. I didn't want to understand it. I thought OK, you enjoy me having sex with your gorgeous wife while you're lying in bed in the next room, so I'll be happy to give you what you deserve. So that's what I did. Still, I could not understand him. I mean two years in the same house with such a sexy wife and no sex would be worse than death, but that's just my opinion.
It got really bizarre at least to a guy like me who has always lived a vanilla lifestyle. She'd call him out and make him watch her perform oral sex on me and tell him that's how she treats a real man. It tortured him. One time he even had tears in his eyes. So I started doing some reading on D/s on my own time without telling her, looking for some answers. I thought, maybe he really does want it and somehow enjoys it but I just can't fathom that. In my opinion, there is no love and no respect. He is nothing but dirt to her. She boasts every financial resource he ever had is in her name. She once very seriously asked what it would take to get me to perform anal sex on him. She meant it. I refused, of course.
Their relationship bothered me so much that I called and tried to talk to him when I knew she wasn't home. He hung up on me and told her about my call. She called me a whore and told me to mind my business or she'll find someone else. Some might say his actions are proof it's his choice. I don't believe that. I feel he's broken and abused.
Aside from my parents there is no one I've thought higher of for many years than this woman. But the way she treats her husband has caused me to lose respect for her. Anytime I try to bring it up, she tells me to mind my own business and she asks "what makes me so high and mighty all of the sudden?" It creates a lot of tension between us but I must confess that tension only makes the sex between us better. She's right, I am a whore. I've kept going back even after having these feelings.
She'd tell you she has more than a decade experience in the lifestyle but I'm convinced she doesn't know much more about it than I do. I still respect her professionally and I at least give her credit for hiding this from their daughter. But I finally have the courage to do the right thing and end this relationship. A strong part of me hopes you'll post this on your site so I can provide a link so she'll read it.