From Johan W:


Dear Elise, I followed your excellent advice on your web site about taking things slow with my husband as it relates to cuckolding. I liked your suggestions on your Q&A about making sure I was positive if this was something I wanted to explore by first experimenting with dating or dancing with other men before jumping into cuckolding.


So Saturday night we went to a single bar and I sat alone while my husband was watching me. It didn't take long before a young man approched me and we began to talk. He was very handsome and much more younger than me. He was very funny and interesting so after a while we went dancing. I was wearing a very sexy dress and I teased him before my husband's eyes. I was very

excited and I let the young man hold me very tight in his arms and I could sense his penis growing against my pussy. It was the first time, since I was married, that I was feeling another man's body and I loved it.


We went back to the bar and while we were talking, he put his arms around me like I was his

girlfriend. We went back dancing many times and finally I let him kiss me and caress me as if we were real lovers. I told him everything about my husband and he was more excited by that. Then I asked him to give me a ride back home.


We spent a lot of time in his car parked before my house, kissing and caressing each other. I made him cum in his pants. We didn't have skin contact and I told him that if he was willing to pass all the medical tests (like HIV), then maybe I could take him for one of my lovers to cuckold my husband. He agreed to the test and we will see about it.


When I went in my house, my husband was waitting for me on his knees and when I approached him, he worshiped my feet passionately. I let him show his devotion for a little while (I know how important these moments are for him) and then I sat and I made him masturbate while he was telling me what he saw at the bar and what he was feeling watching another man with his wife. Then I told him what happened in the car. He got very excited and I gave him permission to ejaculate. He came alI over his hand. I made him lick his cum, telling him to imagine that it was my lover's cum that he was licking because soon it will be, as he will be licking it from my pussy.


When I went to the bar, I was fairly sure that I wanted to cuckold my husband. Now I'm 100% sure. But now I want to raise our relationship to a higher level. From submissive husband/dominant wife to Mistress wife/slave husband or even better, Goddess wife/worshipper level. I want to add the spiritual dimension to his submissiveness and develop my female power. Do you know how I can begin to guide him on this path?



From Crimson C:


Elise, I have a question for you and a real story to share. My story will lead into my question. A girl friend and I are arguing over my lifestyle choice. Cherie has been my best friend since college and we have kept in contact these past fifteen years since we graduated. We were both married in 1994 and were the maid of honor in each other's wedding. We are very close and neither of us are shy to tell the other our opinion.


Cherie was the wilder one in college when it came to men and sex. Today she is a very dedicated wife and loving mother to her two children. I too am a loving wife but I do not have any children by my own choice. My husband introduced me to his submissive fantasies when we were still dating and I came to enjoy dominating him some in the bedroom. Cherie knew about this and she encouraged me to play along with his fantasies as she said it would keep sex fresh and interesting.


After we were married, my husband expressed an interest in moving our D&S out of the bedroom and into more of our everyday life. I was hesitant to do this because I felt the husband should be the head of a marriage. Since I enjoyed our occasional kinky experiences in the bedroom I became curious about what a female dominated marriage would be like. With my husband's encouragement, I eventually came around and agreed to try it.


It did not take me long to fall in love with this lifestyle and our relationship really took off in a deeper and more meaningful way. While Cherie was telling me how she and her husband rarely had sex after their children came along, I was telling her how intense and exciting sex was between my husband and I. She became a bit envious so she told me that she preferred if we no longer discussed such personal matters.


As I grew as a Dominant woman and took charge of my marriage, other people noticed an increase in my confidence and positive attitude. Cherie especially noticed this and she would compliment me on how I looked and handled myself. My husband and I joined a D&S group and although we never became completely comfortable playing with others, it did open me up to other possibilities. One such opportunity was when a woman approached me about becoming a phone counselor with a phone sex service she worked for. I had a career but we wanted to buy a house so I figured we could use the extra money. I only did the phone counseling for a year but during this time, I met some interesting men over the phone. One man in particular was very special and we formed a friendship.


My husband had grown to the place in his submission to me that I felt I could take on another submissive. This man lived half way across the country but he wanted to come and visit me. When I told my husband about it, he went from being jealous and against it at first to becoming excited about the prospect of his wife dominating another man. We set limits that he could accept and I promised to only dominate this man and not to have any sexual relations with him. My husband was perfectly Ok with this.


Over the next year, I played with this man when he came to visit me (we played in his hotel rooms and not at my house) and I even went and visited him one time. We played a total of about a half a dozen times that first year. I became close to this man and we formed a special friendship. Over the past couple of years, I started to do things with this man that my husband does not like to do. My husband hates to travel, as he is a homebody. My husband hates to dance or go to lounges that play live music. My male submissive loves to do these things.


I finally approached my husband about taking this lifestyle to the next level. I told him that I was as much in love with him today as I was when we were married. I told him that no one could ever replace him as number one in my heart. We still enjoy a very close relationship and I love dominating him both in and out of the bedroom. I told my husband that I felt the next step in our FemDom marriage was for me to exercise my authority and liberation by having the right to have sexual relations with my other submissive. I told him it was hard not to allow him some sexual contact when I played with him when we traveled together. My husband struggled a little with this but he yielded to my dominance and he even confessed that cuckolding stories excited him.


For the past year, I have allowed my submissive male friend the freedom to orally service me when we travel or when we play. I will not allow him the freedom to penetrate me because I feel that would be adultery and not right to do to my husband. My husband is still the only man permitted intercourse with me, which is not too often but nonetheless, he is the only one who has that privilege.


Elise, I equally love both men. My husband is still my number one but I also enjoy my male companion. They are two totally different men with separate interests, other than D&S. Even the D&S is different as my husband likes things rough and kinky but my male companion prefers a softer more sensual form of female domination. These men have never met in person but have seen pictures of the other and have talked briefly on the phone. Both seem well adjusted to the fact that I am the Domme and as submissive men, they must be willing to share my time and attention. In a way, I cuckold both of them with the other and that adds to the whole FemDom power dynamics.


Now here is my question. Cherie knows about my male friend as she saw us together one time and when she asked me about him, I was honest with her. This upset her and she calls me occasionally to try to get me to dump this other man and turn my entire attention back to my husband. She keeps telling me that it is impossible for a woman to love two men. She says that I am headed for trouble and a divorce and I must choose between these men.


Elise, I love my current arrangement. I spend eighty percent of my time with my husband as this other man lives 1500 miles from us. I have zero intentions of leaving my husband. My husband struggled some with this but now he seems relaxed and at peace with it. I no longer nag him to take trips with me or to go dancing. He loves being my domestic servant around the house and he loves when I dominate and control his life. Likewise, I am fulfilling a need in my male friend's life. He searched for twenty years for a dominant woman and he loves being with me. He knows I am married and he has never once asked me to leave my husband.


It seems to me that it is possible for a woman to have two men whom she cares about. I am living proof. Cherie is genuinely concerned for me but if she does not cool it with her Dr. Laura type lectures, I might have to end our eighteen-year old friendship. Do you think it is possible for a woman to equally love two men? Are others living the lifestyle I am and is it possible to make such an arrangement work over a long period of time?




From Claire S:


Greetings Elise!  Claire here.  It has been over five months since my husband's last orgasm, and we are both having a ball.  There may be some guys out there wondering how a man can survive this long without relief.  Believe me, guys-it isn't easy.  My husband has survived, but barely.  Being married to a foxy woman, being denied orgasm knowing she's enjoying sex with a lover and he's powerless stop it, and having to endure my taunts and teasing, well...he gets my congratulations. 


Anyway, here's a story that's a bit cute.  My husband knows I meet my lover at hotels, but he never knows when or where.  To "bust his balls" a bit, I recently grabbed a book of matches that they leave as a courtesy in the hotel room ashtray.  That way I had actual "in his face" proof of that the real deal was indeed going down. 


One night, I hog-tied my husband rigidly on our bed and, stretching him as uncomfortably as possible, put his head in a head harness with O-rings and tightly pulled his head up off the mattress towards his ankles.  Now unable to lower his head, he was open season for me to tease the hell out of (*note: it may sound cruel, but he loves this).


I went and put on a tight sweater minus a bra, a tight denim skirt, and my knee high, black leather, platform boots, then returned to the room.  I positioned a chair about six feet from his face and let the fun begin.  First I taunted him a bit, singing "How Dry I Am...How Dry I Am...Nobody Knows How Dry I Am" as a dig to his lack of relief.  Then I told him how good my lover makes me feel.  Then I decided to have a cigarette.


I took out the matches and, with his eyes peering at me, showed them to him.  "There they are baby...from the Hampton just don't know which one.  They're in all the rooms, in the ash trays...nice huh?"  I got closer to him, leaned in.  "You know, these matches cement my relationship with him.  The smoke from one of these matches represents our passion, our attraction for each other."


Then I took the book of matches and teasingly flicked it against the tip of his nose and giggled. Then, after slowly lighting the cigarette, I took careful aim, and blew out the match straight into my husband's bound, raised, helpless face.


The smoke enveloped his head.  The odor was strong and pungent.  The thought of my lover and me were right in my husband's face, his nose, his eyes.  And there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. My how I love this lifestyle!



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